Bad Reviews

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Upton_O_Goode
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Bad Reviews

Postby Upton_O_Goode » Sat Feb 11, 2017 5:38 pm

I recall reading a whole book of these at one time. The reviewers sometimes get off some good lines, such as "This is not a book to be lightly set aside. It should be hurled with great force."

Here are two I read recently, both tossed off by P.G. Wodehouse in various books:

"It was a book I simply couldn't put down. Because I had never picked it up."

"I saw the play under very unfavorable circumstances. The curtain was up."

And, one other from Wodehouse, though not a review:

"It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine."
"A general conversion among the boys was once effected by the late excellent Mr. Fletcher: one poor boy only excepted, who unfortunately resisted the influence of the Holy Spirit, for which he was severely flogged; which did not fail of the desired effect, and impressed proper notions of religion on his mind."

James Lackington, Memoirs of the First Forty-five Years of the Life of James Lackington, the Present Bookseller

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Gord
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Re: Bad Reviews

Postby Gord » Sat Feb 11, 2017 6:12 pm

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"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

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Re: Bad Reviews

Postby Nobrot » Sat Feb 11, 2017 7:09 pm

Kristen Stewart: the worst actress in the solar system.

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Re: Bad Reviews

Postby Matthew Ellard » Sun Feb 12, 2017 10:34 pm

Nobrot wrote:Kristen Stewart: the worst actress in the solar system.
Nope. That would be Elle Macpherson, the Aussie model who tried to become an actress. "Wooden as a fence post" :D

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Re: Bad Reviews

Postby OlegTheBatty » Sun Feb 12, 2017 10:49 pm

Some more reviews.

I was going to write "I've never seen Elle MacPherson act", but I realized it would be ambiguous. Also, not true. I recall she was in something My ex and I watched together. Her acting was neither good enough to recall, nor bad enough to remark on at the time. The movie was 'meh' too.
. . . with the satisfied air of a man who thinks he has an idea of his own because he has commented on the idea of another . . . - Alexandre Dumas 'The Count of Monte Cristo"

There is no statement so absurd that it has not been uttered by some philosopher. - Cicero

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Re: Bad Reviews

Postby Matthew Ellard » Sun Feb 12, 2017 11:08 pm

OlegTheBatty wrote:I was going to write "I've never seen Elle MacPherson act", but I realized it would be ambiguous. Also, not true. I recall she was in something My ex and I watched together. Her acting was neither good enough to recall, nor bad enough to remark on at the time. The movie was 'meh' too.


Aussies & Kiwis have to learn to talk in an English and American dialect to get overseas film work. Some people like Geoffrey Rush and Russell Crowe can do this with ease. For Elle Macpherson delivering lines, it sounds like someone's first words, coming out of a coma, who suffers a severe speech impediment. :D

Then again, Johnny Depp flipped the coin for Pirates of the Caribbean by adopting the dialect of a drunk Australian.

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Re: Bad Reviews

Postby Poodle » Sun Feb 12, 2017 11:12 pm

That would be just Australian, then.


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