Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Gord » Sat Feb 11, 2012 3:35 am

OlegTheBatty wrote:
JO 753 wrote: Many just want 1 date with their fave celebrity.

Isn't that the celebrity's nightmare?

Not if the celebrity is Ozzie Osbourne.
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"Imagine an ennobling of what could be" -- the New Age BS Generator site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby JO 753 » Sun Feb 12, 2012 1:03 am

The date woud be very short. 1/2 owr, 2 owrz max. The fan duznt want to get to know the real person & the celebrity woud probably not want to know too much about the drooling worm groveling at hiz/her feet. There woud also be a few security goonz and a lawyer prezent.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby slapstick » Sun Feb 12, 2012 2:19 am

My favourite Canadian winter video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0id9fUYb95A

Someone needs to show my how to embed videos in posts. Please?
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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Monster » Sun Feb 12, 2012 2:54 am

slapstick wrote:My favourite Canadian winter video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0id9fUYb95A

Someone needs to show my how to embed videos in posts. Please?

Highly amusing.

You do this:

open bracket ytube close bracket

Followed by the entire URL to the youtube video.

open bracket /ytube close bracket

Like so:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0id9fUYb95A
Listening twice as much as you speak is a sign of wisdom.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby JO 753 » Sun Feb 12, 2012 8:16 am

:lol:

I wuz doing that yesterday! Stopped for traffic. then wen I took my foot off the brake the car woudnt move. I had to push it with the door open all the way over the brij!

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby slapstick » Sun Feb 12, 2012 8:51 pm

You do this:

open bracket ytube close bracket

Followed by the entire URL to the youtube video.

open bracket /ytube close bracket


Much appreciated!

Given that I live in Quebec, a province notorious for heavy snowfalls followed my freezing rain, I drive a 4x4 pickup. And I try not to get into police chases. :lol:
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Stupid and tough

Postby Chachacha » Wed Mar 14, 2012 5:27 pm

"If you're gonna be stupid, you gotta be tough."

When I repeated this quote to my Brazillian friend, he had the same reaction I had, "You know, that's true! That's true isn't it? If you're gonna be stupid, you do have to be tough!" Then proceeded to tell me this story:

When partying while drunk, he and his friends were walking from one party to another party, and he saw a spear-topped wrought iron fence, and decided he would jump over it.

(If you're gonna be stupid, you gotta be tough.)

When he ran to the fence and grabbed the spears to jump over it, he discovered the spears were on a separate bar, and were only attached to the fence with wire: the top of the fence came off and one of the spears stabbed him as he and the row of wrought iron spears crashed to the ground.

(If you're gonna be stupid, you gotta be tough.)

As he's lying on the ground, bleeding and groaning, a neighbor ran out with a container of vinegar mixed with salt, and poured it into his wound to disinfect it.

(If you're gonna be stupid, you gotta be tough.)

Two days later, it occurred to him that a tetanus shot might be a good idea, but the doctor scoffed, "You can't get a tetanus shot now! It's too late, you have to get that within 24 hours." When he asked what he should do if it became infected, the doctor said, "Come back."

(If you're gonna be stupid, you gotta be tough.)

Everything turned out fine, and he has a fabulously nasty looking scar to accompany his story and prove that if you're gonna be stupid, you gotta be tough.

:)

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby fromthehills » Wed Mar 14, 2012 9:18 pm

A friend of mine, which is the broad use of the term, an acquaintance that I like pretty well gave me a toothless grin and "That's so true." When I played the song, If Your Gonna be Dumb, You Gotta be Tough". He's around 30yo.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Chachacha » Thu Mar 15, 2012 1:27 am

fromthehills wrote:A friend of mine, which is the broad use of the term, an acquaintance that I like pretty well gave me a toothless grin and "That's so true." When I played the song, If Your Gonna be Dumb, You Gotta be Tough". He's around 30yo.


:lol: It IS true, for all of us!

Found the song on youtube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4HJY9tQ94M

"I ain't the sharpest knive in the drawer..." :lol:

Great song.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby fromthehills » Thu Mar 15, 2012 2:55 am

Chachacha wrote:
fromthehills wrote:A friend of mine, which is the broad use of the term, an acquaintance that I like pretty well gave me a toothless grin and "That's so true." When I played the song, If Your Gonna be Dumb, You Gotta be Tough". He's around 30yo.


:lol: It IS true, for all of us!

Found the song on youtube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4HJY9tQ94M

"I ain't the sharpest knive in the drawer..." :lol:

Great song.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CCja-MteYL8 :mrgreen:

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Chachacha » Thu Mar 15, 2012 5:30 am

:lol:

I like him! I am not a country music fan - except when it's good: good music is good music, no matter what the genre; and I love the simplicity of a singer and a guitar, and I like hearing writers sing their songs. Another good one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h0sjAIij ... creen&NR=1

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Gord » Fri Mar 16, 2012 8:22 am

I can't tell if this headline is funny or not: http://static8.businessinsider.com/imag ... -rules.jpg

I think it is. I think. But every time I try to laugh.... :|

Wait! This joke is better: http://partiallyclips.com/comics/2011-0 ... n_rain.jpg

Ooh! Ooh! This one! This is the one, here we go: http://partiallyclips.com/comics/2002-1 ... _storm.jpg
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"Imagine an ennobling of what could be" -- the New Age BS Generator site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Chachacha » Fri Mar 16, 2012 12:28 pm

The headline and your comments reminded me of the South Park episode in which a local priest saw a news report about men coming forward to say, when they were boys, their priest sexual molested them. And the priest was shocked to hear this, and he couldn't get over the horror of priests molesting young boys, so he called a meeting of the priests in the area and announced, "This is terrible! Men are coming forward and saying their priest molested them when they were boys!" And all the priests are upset by this, very upset, and they agree this is horrible. And he says, "We have to stop this!!" And they all agree it HAS TO STOP!!! But how ...how to stop those they molested from telling?

Funny because it's true. Not funny because it's true.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby HghrSymmetry » Wed Oct 10, 2012 6:00 pm

Don't find many Heroes like this one!
On January 9th, a group of Pekin, Illinois bikers were riding west on I-74 when they saw a girl about to jump off the Murray Baker Bridge .
So they stopped.

George, their leader, a big burly man of 53, gets off his Harley, walks through a group of gawkers, past the State Trooper, and says, "What are you doing?"
She says, "I'm going to commit suicide."

While he didn't want to appear "sensitive," he didn't want to miss a be-a-legend opportunity either so he asked ... "Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a kiss?"

So, with no hesitation at all, she leaned back over the railing and did just that ... and it was a long, deep, lingering kiss followed immediately by another one.

After they finished, George gets approval from his biker-buddies, the onlookers, and even the State Trooper, and says, "Wow! That was the best kiss I have ever had Honey! That's a real talent you're wasting Sugar Shorts. You could be famous if you rode with me. Why are you committing suicide?"

"My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl."

It's still unclear whether she jumped or was pushed.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby HghrSymmetry » Fri Oct 19, 2012 5:23 pm

.
.
.
.
Just another pleasant day at the beach...

http://www.bitoffun.com/video_vault/boat-launch-fun.htm

;)

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Matthew Ellard » Sat Oct 20, 2012 12:08 am

HghrSymmetry wrote:.Just another pleasant day at the beach...
http://www.bitoffun.com/video_vault/boat-launch-fun.htm
;)


They got all the cars out eventually and put on a show for the audience watching from the beach. I would have sat down for a while to watch. It's fun watching people solve problems in good spirits. It was also good watch so many people trying to help.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby HghrSymmetry » Sat Oct 20, 2012 1:26 am

Matthew Ellard wrote:
HghrSymmetry wrote:.Just another pleasant day at the beach...
http://www.bitoffun.com/video_vault/boat-launch-fun.htm
;)


They got all the cars out eventually and put on a show for the audience watching from the beach. I would have sat down for a while to watch. It's fun watching people solve problems in good spirits. It was also good watch so many people trying to help.



Indeed.
:)

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Gord » Sat Nov 03, 2012 6:59 am

Hurray! I found a video that puts me to sleep!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r_uwicUcdUE

I nodded off THREE TIMES trying to watch it. (Maybe it affected my pie-null gland. :nuts: )
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"Imagine an ennobling of what could be" -- the New Age BS Generator site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Chachacha » Sat Nov 03, 2012 4:06 pm

HghrSymmetry wrote:.
.
.
.
Just another pleasant day at the beach...

http://www.bitoffun.com/video_vault/boat-launch-fun.htm

;)


I suggest the title be changed to "People who have watched too many truck commercials."

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Matthew Ellard » Tue Nov 27, 2012 4:43 am

Gord wrote:Hurray! I found a video that puts me to sleep!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r_uwicUcdUE

I nodded off THREE TIMES trying to watch it. (Maybe it affected my pie-null gland. :nuts: )


That was funny. Someone gave the film editor enough footage to make a 5 minute documentary and said "stretch it to half an hour". The pan pipes wafting away to a still photo on screen for five seconds was a very very long time......
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzz........

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby HghrSymmetry » Sat Dec 01, 2012 6:05 pm

OK, so the Brazilians may be steeped in woo, but us hardcore skeptics wouldn't fall for this one...right?

;)

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=f47_1353943384

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Major Malfunction » Sun Dec 02, 2012 1:55 am

That's hilarious! But it's lucky no-one tried to punch her out.
This being was produced using the same process as other beings, and therefore, may contain traces of nuts.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby HghrSymmetry » Sun Dec 02, 2012 2:08 am

Agreed MM. Though I wonder if there some who were less than impressed that they just sent to the cutting room floor.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Gord » Sun Dec 02, 2012 7:23 am

That's not funny. No one even said hello to that poor little girl!
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"Imagine an ennobling of what could be" -- the New Age BS Generator site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby HghrSymmetry » Sun Dec 02, 2012 7:42 am

Good point.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Gord » Sun Dec 02, 2012 8:26 am

I disagree!
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"Imagine an ennobling of what could be" -- the New Age BS Generator site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Major Malfunction » Sun Dec 02, 2012 9:54 am

No-one even offered her a lolly.
This being was produced using the same process as other beings, and therefore, may contain traces of nuts.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Gord » Sun Dec 02, 2012 11:26 am

Major Malfunction wrote:No-one

*Slap slap slap slap slap!*
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"Imagine an ennobling of what could be" -- the New Age BS Generator site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby HghrSymmetry » Sun Dec 02, 2012 9:11 pm

.
.
Happy winter solstice: http://www.draftfcb.com/holiday2011/

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Gord » Sun Dec 02, 2012 9:39 pm

HghrSymmetry wrote:.
.
Happy winter solstice: http://www.draftfcb.com/holiday2011/

I tried "France" and "Jamaica" and got images, but "we have no image available" for Canada??? :lol:

Aw c'mon, there's an image available when I type in "the moon"!!!
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"Imagine an ennobling of what could be" -- the New Age BS Generator site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby HghrSymmetry » Mon Dec 03, 2012 2:08 am

You got mooned? :shock:

I didn't know it was that kind of site.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Gord » Mon Dec 03, 2012 5:09 am

I did the mooning.
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"Imagine an ennobling of what could be" -- the New Age BS Generator site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby HghrSymmetry » Mon Dec 03, 2012 5:20 am

Ah, of course.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby HghrSymmetry » Thu Dec 27, 2012 4:37 am


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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Major Malfunction » Fri Dec 28, 2012 6:15 am

Gord wrote:
Major Malfunction wrote:No-one

*Slap slap slap slap slap!*

You can take away my freedom, but no-one'll ever take my NO-ONE!!!
This being was produced using the same process as other beings, and therefore, may contain traces of nuts.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Gord » Fri Dec 28, 2012 7:29 am

Major Malfunction wrote:
Gord wrote:
Major Malfunction wrote:No-one

*Slap slap slap slap slap!*

You can take away my freedom, but no-one'll ever take my NO-ONE!!!

*Slappity slappity slappity slappity slap!*
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"Imagine an ennobling of what could be" -- the New Age BS Generator site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Major Malfunction » Fri Dec 28, 2012 8:59 am

NO-ONE!!!

Gurgle....
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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Gord » Sat Dec 29, 2012 2:19 am

Major Malfunction wrote:NO-ONE!!!

Gurgle....

Die foul demon!

*throttle*
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"Imagine an ennobling of what could be" -- the New Age BS Generator site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby Matthew Ellard » Mon Dec 31, 2012 12:21 am

HghrSymmetry wrote:.
.
Happy winter solstice: http://www.draftfcb.com/holiday2011/


Err....umm....It displayed a photo of four houses including my house from ground level. I entered my No#, Street name and suburb but didn't enter Australia. Not bad.

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Re: Hijax Hijinx and Humorous Asides

Postby HghrSymmetry » Mon Dec 31, 2012 9:01 pm

Acknowledged.

;)


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